"No really, officer -- it's just a spork!"
This is for when you get into trouble harassing people with other Sporks of Fury. Er -- I mean, this is for authorized law enforcement officers who like to eat on the go.
(Seriously, though: I have no idea if this is real, but if it is then don't even think about trying to use them to get out of a situation you've been put into lawfully. But if you're kidnapped, cuffed, and thrown in the trunk, then maybe this could be your out!)
1) Print. (Use support material.)
2) Run around the neighborhood like an 8 year old playing Water Balloon Freeze Tag -- but be sure there are no kids around. Eventually you'll get picked up by some nice people in uniforms, and if you ask nicely you might get a chance to experiment with the spork.